Tags: Arnott's, biscuit, lattice, pastry
Being a keen biscuit fan, it’s always exciting when Mrs Chillikebab brings home something new with the groceries. And the other day she brought home something very promising indeed – the Arnott’s Lattice. The packet proclaims them to be ‘Flaky Pastry Biscuits’, and as pastry is something else I’m rather fond of, the idea of combining pastry and biscuits into one is quite exciting.
The biscuits are square, with sixteen dimples arranged to make, well, a lattice. The top surface is then glazed, and this glistens most attractively in the light. There is something slightly odd about the way they look, though – the sharp corners and high glaze somehow makes them look as though they should be part of something else, rather than being on their own. It’s as if someone swiped them from a pastry-chef before he had time to assemble them into some kind of croquembouche-style confection (as opposed to a croc embouchure, which is what happens when a crocodile plays trombone. But I digress).
This feeling is reinforced by the recipe included on the pack, which has directions for making custard which they suggest is then sandwiched between two lattices ‘repeating until all the biscuits have been used’. So bad luck if you just wanted one custard slice; you are going to get ten (as there are 20 biscuits in the packet).
So what do they taste like? In a word, dry. They have that ability to suck all the moisture out of your mouth as they disintegrate into dessicated crumbs. Perhaps Arnott’s should include a warning on the pack that they are only to be consumed with a cup of tea. The glaze has a distinct vanilla flavour, which further reinforces the notion that someone forgot the custard. They definitely don’t have a ‘luxury’ feel to them – they are made with vegetable oil, not butter, and the vanilla flavour has an artificial tang to it. When taken with tea, they are pleasant enough, but you must remember not to finish the tea until you have satiated yourself on the biscuits. Otherwise you’ll have to make another cup of tea, and then you’ll end up eating more biscuits, and we all know where that cycle leads.
Overall, I’d give them a 4 out of 10. Perhaps the marriage of biscuit and pastry is simply not to be.